No, this is not a post about baby goats. It is a post of how amazed I am at how many of my friends have children. I have come to realize this via Facebook. Otherwise I really wouldn’t have a clue. Literally every day I see that one of my friends has posted photos of their kids. There are a few friends who have multiple children. There were a couple times I was talking on the phone with a friend who has three children under the age of 5 and thatwas some amazing birth control. (Just to be clear, that’s a joke. Get it? Ha ha?) On a serious note, all the way through college, I wanted to get married and have children so much it hurt. (Only a mild exaggeration.) While it wasn’t all I wanted, I had hopes of leaving college with a BA and an MRS. degree. (Hah! Another joke!) Well, that didn’t happen. What’s neat is that while I still desire to get married and would like to have kids one day (and/or adopt) it is not something I pine away for. Some of my times of loneliness have been intense, but all in all, I am kinda glad that I don’t have children. My mom had me when she was 21 (a week shy of 22) and when I think about how if I had done the same I would have a 7 year old right now it makes me think, “That would be crazy!” Yes, if that had happened, I wouldn’t be saying the same thing but don’t ruin my point! One thing I can say, I feel more equipped to have children now than I did 7 years ago. And I have a feeling I will feel more equipped a few years from now. So while God is the only one who knows what the future holds, I think I am finally content with waiting for that time of life. And that, my friends, is no small miracle.
Posts Tagged ‘marriage’
As an only child, when I was growing up I had a big fixation with babies. I was enraptured by their cuteness! Partially due to what I had been taught about a women’s place in the church (i.e., the pew, the piano, the playpen), this lasted all the way through my undergraduate years. While I didn’t go to college for my MRS. degree, I really wanted to (and thought I would) get married young and have children young. And since I am by no means old, by young I mean early twenties which is passed and opening. Sure Mr. Wonderful could fall out of the sky at any point and ask me to be Mrs. Wonderful, but it’s looking more and more like marriage and family is something that is not going to be in the near future. And honestly, though it makes me sad to think this, I wonder if that is “in the cards” for me at all. But that aside, for those of you who have waited to have children, what’s your perspective? (i.e., are you glad you waited? What are the benefits of waiting?
Photo by: Me! (c)
I think I am scared of commitment rigt now. This is a strange thing because I have not had this come up before. While I was in the Navy I had way too much going on. I had no boundaries in my life and always did what I thought I “should” do which was everything I was asked. That’s all changed in the past year. I have been practicing my “no” quite a bit. It has been nice. But now that I really want to say yes to things I am having a hard time doing that. I am afraid that I am going to take on too much again. I am afraid I am going to get overwhelmed and start to drown in requirements and commitments. I am afraid I am going to fail. But I am going CRAZY! I need to be involved in some kind of ministry and soon! I have said yes to getting involved in youth group but that shifts gears in the summer and slows down quite a bit. *sigh* I don’t know how God does it because I sure annoy the crap out of myelf sometimes.
On another note, I went to a wedding tonight. I wasn’t sure how it was going to pan out becauses literally the only person I knew there was the bride and she had quite a few other things on her mind. Well, it went well. While I still desire to get married one day, this desire no longer consumes me. Ever since I have felt God’s call on my life this desire, while ever present, is not as prominent in my mind. It’s kinda neat. : ) Cheers to the happy couple, A & R!