and that doesn’t happen all that often. That is partially because I have not always believed that I was in fact beautiful. Now I believe it (at least I believe it more frequently than not) but I don’t always feel that way. Feelings are fleeting so that’s okay, but it’s nice to feel it sometimes. And today I did. To top it off, when my Pastor A saw me she said, “Well don’t you look gorgeous.” That made me feel like a million bucks.
Truth is (although this might sound really cheesy) ever since I have started walking towards God’s calling on my life I have felt more confident in who I am…in who God has created me to be. As we were sitting around before Easter dinner tonight my cousin asked me how classes were going. I told him they were going well. He asked me if I was taking “theology” classes and I told him yes to which he said, “And you’re loving it, right?” And I nodded my head. And then he said, “I don’t know why you didn’t just do what you’re doing now from the beginning” (or something along those lines). I can’t begin to explain how awesome it is when those who are closest to me, who have seen some of my worst moments, and who have beliefs different from my own, affirm my pursuit of ordination. It’s amazing really. Though there have been people I have told that do not agree theologically with women in ministry, for the most part many people that I have told are not suprised at all. In fact, many of them wonder what took me so long. : ) I tell you what though. It doesn’t seem long to me. It seems very short indeed! And of all the things in life that I want to be sure of this is definitely high on the list!
God is so good to me. I am so thankful for his patient teaching and gracious love. Even when I haven’t felt it he’s been lovin’ on me this whole time. My tears were his tears…my pain was his pain…Jesus is my hero. That’s the short of it.
He is risen! He is risen indeed! He is alive and well and loves me well.